Who wants to be Grimmjow's Seme? Bleach Edition
by Neith S. Ruckus
Summary: Bleach and its character does not belongs to me! Kubo-sensei has the rights to them. No infringement of copyright intended. Characters maybe OOC, yaoi, eventual Ichi/Grimm, eventual smex... M for inappropriate language and sexual content
1. Prologue

**_Who wants to be Grimmjow's Seme? Bleach Edition_**

_Prologue_

_Welcome to "Who wants to be some lovely uke's seme?"! Starting off our first season is Who wants to be Grimmjow's Seme? Bleach Edition! I'm Ruckus, your host for the night. The grand prize of our show is the untamable Grimmjow Jaegerjacques! (cue a cage with an unconscious Grimmjow being locked inside lowering down). Don't worry folks, he's just sleeping, otherwise, we wouldn't have gotten him here._

_Contestants of this game must answer 10 questions correctly to win our prize! To prove that our game is not rigged, each correct answer has a prize, starting from a chaste kiss and ending with winning Grimmjow! Contestants can choose to give up the question and leave with the prize for the question that they are at. If anyone did managed to answer al 10 questions, a bonus question will be asked. The prize for the bonus question will be revealed later. Today's contestants are as listed:_

_Contestant 01: Aizen_

_Contestant 02: Starrk_

_Contestant 03: Ulquiorra_

_Contestant 04: Hichigo_

_Contestant 05: Ichigo_

_And now, let the game begin!_


	2. Contestant 1: Aizen

**_Who wants to be Grimmjow's Seme? Bleach Edition_**

_Chapter 1_

**_Ruckus: First up is Aizen! Welcome, Aizen-sama. (bows in greeting)_**

_Aizen: Thank you for having me here. (sitting down in the chair after walking out from backstage)_

**_Ruckus: Aizen-sama, how do you feel about joining this game?_**

_Aizen: Well, truth be told, I didn't sign up for this. Gin signed me up…_

**_Ruckus: Uh-huh, so why did you come here then?_**

_Aizen: He told me that there is a tea appreciation group being held here, and so I came._

**_Ruckus: … You really do love your tea huh?_**

_Aizen: Yes, of course. Would you like some?_

**_Ruckus: Erm, no, we still need to continue with this game show._**

_Aizen: Fine then. The earlier this thing ends, the sooner I can get back to making plans for the invasion._

**_Ruckus: Er, alright then. First question, which of the following is different? A) Squirrel, B) Hamster, C) Cat or D) Rabbit._**

_Aizen: Hmm, I suppose it would be C)._

**_Ruckus: Is that your final answer?_**

_Aizen: (nods)_

**_Ruckus: Alright! And the correct answer is (drum roll in the background) C)! Congratulations! You win a kiss on the cheeks from our lovely uke! Next question, what is the answer to the following equation?_**

**_9x – 7i = 3(3x – 7u)_**

**_A) i less than 3u, B) i less than u, C) 3u less than i or D) u less than i_**

_Aizen: I think Gin has shown me something like this before…_

**_Ruckus: Really? So what is your answer then?_**

_Aizen: I'll go with A)._

**_Ruckus: You must thank Gin then, the correct answer is A). Now your prize is a kiss on the lips. Moving on, the third question is which of this spelling is correct? A) Hipopotomonstrosesquipedalio phobia, B) Hippopotomonstrosesquipedali ophobia, C) Hippopotomonstrosequipedalio phobia or D) Hipppotomonstrosesquipedalio phobia._**

_Aizen: Well, this is a tough one… I seriously don't know the answer to this one…_

**_Ruckus: So? Do you want to give up?_**

_Aizen: Nope, give up is not in my dictionary. D) seems to be the correct answer._

**_Ruckus: Then your answer is D)?_**

_Aizen: Mmhm. (nods)_

**_Ruckus: I'm so sorry Aizen-sama, looks like being god doesn't mean that you are smart… (cue angry twitch from Aizen) Anyway, your prize is kiss on the lips from our lovely uke!_**

_Aizen: (looks towards the suspended cage) But isn't he unconscious?_

**_Ruckus I'll wake him up!_**_(picks up a loud speaker and yells) Oi, Grimmy-chan! Ichigo is here!_

_Grimmjow: (startled) What the fuck?! Berry! Where are you? (realises his situation) Where the hell am I? How come I'm not in my own room!_

**_Ruckus: Well, because you are the important part of our game show!_**

_Grimmjow: How the hell am I an important part in your game show! I didn't ask to take part! And why the hell are you and that bastard down there while I'm in this fucking hanging cage!_

**_Ruckus: Sheesh, stop asking me so much questions! I'm going to let you down and you have to kiss said bastard on the lips._**

_Grimmjow: No way!_

**_Ruckus: Come on now, be good and we can let you out of the cage sooner. Do it now and I promise you that I'll get Ichigo to fight with you okay?_**

_Grimmjow: (perks up) A fight with Ichigo? You promise?_

**_Ruckus: Yes, I promise. (whispers) But not the kind of fight that you are looking for... Hehe..._**

_Grimmjow: Ok, then._

**_Ruckus: Lower the cage dudes! (walks up to the cage as it lowers down, pulling a key from pocket and opens the cage) Come on out Grimmy-chan!_**

_Grimmjow: (glares vehemently at Ruckus) Just one kiss only right?_

_Ruckus: Yep! On the lips though…_

_Grimmjow: (glares even more, walks to Aizen and presses their lips together) There, done. (wipes lips immediately)_

_Ruckus: Aww, Grimmy-chan that was too fast! I wanted to capture the moment you know…_

_Aizen: I don't mind having to kiss him again just for you to take a photo. Grimmjow here has such nice soft lips… (smirks)_

Grimmjow: (growls lowly) You bastard…

**_Ruckus: Now, now, let's not start a fight here, ok? We've got a show to run! (turns to Aizen) Thank you for coming, goodbye!_**

_Aizen: Well, then back to my plans. (walks off the stage)_

**_Ruckus: (turns to Grimmjow) Grimmy-chan, you seemed so happy and excited upon hearing me shout Ichigo's name, perhaps you desire to have him?_**

Grimmjow: (sputters and turns red in the face) Y-you! Watch what you are saying! I only want to fight him!

**_Ruckus: Oh well, deny all you want, when this show ends, we'll see who's right! (turns to the audience) Alright, let's go for a little commercial break and after that, we'll be having Starrk on the hot seat! Don't go away!_**

Grimmjow: What! The lazy bastard is here too?!

**_Ruckus: Don't fuss so much and get back into the cage! (pushes Grimmjow back into the cage and locks it up)_**


	3. Contestant 2: Starrk

**_Who wants to be Grimmjow's Seme? Bleach Edition_**

_Chapter 2_

**_Ruckus: Welcome back! Our next contestant is the narcoleptic Espada, Starrk!_**

_Starrk: (yawns as he walks out)_

**_Ruckus: =_=||| Wake up!_**

_Starrk: No need to shout… I'm awake already… (yawns again)_

**_Ruckus: Hmph, you better stay awake..._**

_Starrk: Yes, yes… you sound like Lillinette… (sits down and blinks a bit)_

**_Ruckus: You better stick to your promise, Starrk. (glares) Now, tell us about the reason for joining this game._**

_Starrk: (murmurs sleepily) Lillinette thought that it would be good for me to join a game show so as to (yawns) give my brain a workout, so I signed up._

**_Ruckus: Let's hope that you don't fall asleep while you're answering the questions is good enough for me…_**

_Starrk: Well then, can we start now?_

**_Ruckus: Yeah, first question, which of the following is not an athletic sports? A) Basketball, B) Running, C) Javelin throw or D) 3000m steeplechase_**

_Starrk: (rubs eyes and yawns some more) Should be A) I guess…_

**_Ruckus: Be serious will you!_**

_Starrk: Ok, A) is my answer…_

**_Ruckus: Well, then consider yourself lucky because, A) is right._**

_Starrk: Can't I consider myself as smart?_

**_Ruckus: No, moving on to the second question. What does Claustrophobia means? A) Fear of heights, B) Fear of enclosed/small space, C) Fear of the unknown or D) Fear of youth?_**

_Starrk: This is kind of tough… (yawns) Can I ask for help?_

**_Ruckus: No, we do not have help options. And don't try to cheat ok!_**

_Starrk: Not like I was planning to…_

**_Ruckus: So, what's your answer?_**

_Starrk: I think I've heard of this from someone… B)…_

**_Ruckus: Alright, and the answer that we have is… B)! Congratulations!_**

_Starrk: Next question, please… (eyes drooping close)_

**_Ruckus: Oi! Don't sleep! Third question is, what is the value of x as derived from the equation shown?_**

**_5x + 3 – 3y = 4x – 2y +5_**

**_Where y = 2_**

**_Is it A) 1, B) 6, C) 4 or D) 3_**

_Starrk: C)_

**_Ruckus: You seem so sure of the answer._**

_Starrk: It's just maths, easy…_

**_Ruckus: And you're right! The third prize is a hug from Grimmy-chan! The fourth question is which of these composers is not from the Baroque era? A) Johann Sebastian Bach, B) George Frideric Handel, C) Denis Gaultier or D) Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart._**

_Starrk: D)._

**_Ruckus: Quite confident of your answer eh?_**

_Starrk: I listen to classical music all the time…_

**_Ruckus: Don't you sleep the day away?_**

_Starrk: Yes, but I sleep listening to classical music…_

**_Ruckus: Huh… (doesn't believe him) Whatever… Since you're such an expert, then you should not be disappointed by the results. Correct answer is D)! And the prize that you have won is a photo of Grimmjow in a provocative position!_**

Grimmjow: Oi! Where did you get that?! How the hell did you managed to get a picture of me in the first place!

**_Ruckus: Don't question the abilities of our production team! How we got it is a secret… Anyway, seems like your brain is still working pretty well_**

_Starrk: Who says that it's not working?_

**_Ruckus: Me. Now the fifth question is this, which of the following are the four major categories of plants? A) Fungi, Algae, Flowering plants and Conifers, B) Ferns, Mosses, Flowering plants and Algae, C) Flowering plants, Conifers, Ferns and Mosses or D) Fungi, Flowering plants, Ferns and Conifers?_**

_Starrk: Fungi do not photosynthesize and algae are actually microorganisms so it's D)…_

**_Ruckus: You must learn a lot from the scientist… D) is right! The prize that you have won is a date with Grimmjow!_**

_Starrk: Aah, what a useless prize…_

**_Ruckus: Useless to you because you like to sleep…_**

_Starrk: Now that you've reminded me, I want to give up now… I still prefer sleeping… than being here…_

_**Ruckus: You're insulting our game, aren't you?**__**(=_=メ**__**)**_

_Starrk:_ _Take it however you want... Can I claim my prize now?_

_**Ruckus: (walks to the cage and unlocks it) Because we still have a show to run, you can only have a date with him here. A dining area has been set up over there (points to some corner) and the food is being prepared. Don't try anything funny, got it?**_

_Starrk: Yes, yes._

_Grimmjow: Finally out again! (stretching himself)_

_**Ruckus: Enjoy your "date" with sleepy!**_

_Starrk: Come on Grimmjow… (walks to the table and sits down)_

_Grimmjow: Alright, alright, don't need to be pushy._

_**Ruckus: We will be going for another short break! Tune in for our next contestant, Ulquiorra!**_

_Starrk: Wake me when the food comes… (lays head on the table and falls asleep)_

_Grimmjow: Damned lazy bastard… Hey! You said that the bootlicker is coming!_

_**Ruckus: Yep! The pale faced bastard, as you eloquently called him, is coming later!**_

_Grimmjow: More weird bastards coming up…_


	4. Contestant 3: Ulquiorra

**_Who wants to be Grimmjow's Seme? Bleach Edition_**

_Chapter 3_

_**Ruckus: Coming up is the ever stoic Ulquiorra! Welcome, gloomy-face-of-doom!**_

_Ulquiorra: Trash, how dare you insult me._

_**Ruckus: Man, you can't take a joke huh?**_

_Ulquiorra: (Impending Glare of Doom)_

_**Ruckus: |||**_

_Ulquiorra: Mind starting now?_

_**Ruckus: Er, ok. First question, which of the following animals is not a carnivore? A) Cat, B) Rabbit, C) Wolf or D) Lion?**_

_Ulquiorra: Too easy, B)._

_**Ruckus: We start off with easy ones in case you guys can't get it. Anyway, the answer is right. Moving on, what is the chemical formula of oleic acid? A) **_**_CH3(CH2)14CO2H, B) _****_C18H32O2, C) _****_CH3(CH2)7CH=CH(CH2)7COOH or D) CH3(CH2)5CH=CH(CH2)7COOH?_**

_Ulquiorra: C)._

_**Ruckus: Right again, this is moving quickly…**_

_Ulquiorra: Less talk trash._

_**Ruckus: What? In a hurry to win your prize? You might not get it going at this speed. Too fast, too easy to make mistakes.**_

_Ulquiorra: (Impending Glare of Doom, again)_

_**Ruckus: Right, less talk. Third question, what is a Perennial plant? **__**A)**_**_A plant that lives for more than two years, B) plant that uses wood as its structural tissue, C) a flowering plant that takes two years to complete its biological lifecycle or D) a plant grown outdoors in the spring and summer and surviving just for one growing season_**

_Ulquiorra: A)._

_**Ruckus: Correct, fourth question, what does PTSD stands for? A) Pre Test Stress Disorder, B) Post Test Stress Disorder, C) Pathetic Tosser Sucking Dick or D) Posttraumatic Stress Disorder?**_

_Ulquiorra: D)._

_**Ruckus: I guess, you would know that considering you are the one to deal people with a traumatic experience…**_

_Ulquiorra: Shut up._

_**Ruckus: (rolls eyes) Correct answer, next question, how many laws are there in Newton's law of gravity? A) 2, B) 4, C) 1 or D) 3?**_

_Ulquiorra: D)._

_**Ruckus: Right, sixth question, which of the following groups are continents? A) North America/South America/Africa, B) Australia/India/Asia, C) America/China/India or D) Europe/Antartica/China?**_

_Ulquiorra: A)_

_**Ruckus: You win a striptease from Grimmjow!**_

_Grimmjow: (from the corner that they are seated in) Fuck you Ruckus! I'm not giving him one!_

_**Ruckus: No thanks, Grimmy-chan, I appreciate your thought, but I would rather you get fucked. Pretty please? (puts on puppy dog eyes) I'll have him bound to the chair and you can do it like five metres away from him… And I get catnip for you too!**_

_Grimmjow: Catnip and three rounds of fighting with Ichigo._

_**Ruckus: Deal!**_

_Grimmjow: The things I do for catnip and a good round of fighting…_

_Ulquiorra: Are you two quite done yet?_

_**Ruckus: Yes, yes, your stick-up-the-ass Highness. Seventh question, who is the person who drew Bleach? A) Akira Amano, B) Tite Kubo, C) **_**_Matsuri Hino or D) Katsura Hoshino?_**

_Ulquiorra: …_

_**Ruckus: So, are you stumped?**_

_Ulquiorra: Shut up._

_**Ruckus: You don't care much for people, so you don't really bother. Now you're stuck right? Just choose any one, 25% chance of getting it right.**_

_Ulquiorra: … D) then…_

_**Ruckus: And you walk away with a striptease!**_

_Ulquiorra: …_

_**Ruckus: Gloomy face, stop being so gloomy!**_

_Ulquiorra: Can I collect my prize now?_

_**Ruckus: Of course! Grimmy-chan! Come on! You made a deal with me, remember?**_

_Grimmjow: No need to shout! I can hear you just fine!_

_**Ruckus: I'll go get the rope! (disappears to backstage)**_

_Grimmjow: (murmurs to self) Seriously, I'm going soft in the head for allowing them to drag me through this shit… (walks to the stage)_

_**Ruckus: I'm back! (holding a roll of rope) Now, your stick-in-the-butt Highness, sit still while I tie you up.**_

_Ulquiorra: This is ridiculous…_

_**Ruckus: This is for Grimmy-chan's virginity! What if you decided that you wanted to ravish him half way through his performance?**_

_Ulquiorra: … Fine_

_**Ruckus: (hums while binding Ulquiorra to the chair) Done! Now on with the show! Grimm-chan, if you please?**_

_Grimmjow: Damned idiot for making me do this… (mutters)_

_**Ruckus: (sits down and stares at Grimmjow) Music, please.**_

_Grimmjow: (starts pulling off his jacket, letting fall from his shoulders)_

_Ulquiorra: (stares intently)_

_Grimmjow: (blushes, but continues, hands fumbling over his naked torso, moving towards his obi)_

_Ulquiorra: (gaze following Grimmjow's hands) _

_**Ruckus: (drooling slightly)**_

_Grimmjow: (starts to untie the obi, pausing halfway as if hesitating to continue)_

_**Ruckus: Starrk! Food's ready!**_

_Starrk: (awakes and yawns) Where's the food? (looks around)_

_Grimmjow: (blushes even more and quickly stops, grabbing his jacket and pulls it on)_

_Ulquiorra: Trash, do you have to go and wake Uno up? And just as Sexta was about to get to the good part…_

_**Ruckus: It's fun for me!**_

_Starrk: What did I miss? (rubs eyes)_

_Ulquiorra: Nothing._

_**Ruckus: Oh well, since you have received your prize, we'll go for another commercial before Hichigo comes in.**_

_Ulquiorra: You cheating trash._

_**Ruckus: Whatever… Grimmy-chan! Back into the cage! And thanks for coming Starrk!**_

_Ulquiorra: (leaves the stage fuming)_

_Starrk: Well, then back to my room to sleep... Adios…_


	5. Contestant 4: Hichigo

**_Who wants to be Grimmjow's Seme? Bleach Edition_**

_Chapter 4_

_**Ruckus: Well, break's over, so let's invite our next contestant, Hichigo!**_

_Ichigo: (comes out from the back) Why am I here?_

_**Ruckus: Why are you here? Because Hichigo signed up for this game show.**_

_Ichigo: No wonder he keeps telling me to come here, saying that he has important matters to attend to…_

_**Ruckus: Well, now that you are here, please let him out so that we can start.**_

_Ichigo: Ok, fine. (proceeds to materialize Hichigo out)_

_Grimmjow: Oi berry! (shouts from the cage) I wanna fight you later_

_Ichigo: What! Grimmjow's here too! (stops in surprise)_

_**Ruckus: He's the grand prize of our game show! Of course he should be here.**_

_Ichigo: That means if Hichi wins, Grimmjow belongs to him?_

_**Ruckus: Technically, yes! You jealous?**_

_Ichigo: (sputters) N-no! And what do you mean by technically?_

_**Ruckus: Well, the purpose of this game to find Grimmy-chan a seme, so he will become Hichigo's lover if he wins…**_

_Ichigo: … (growls softly)_

_**Ruckus: Oooh, somebody's jealous… Come on now, bring out Hichigo.**_

_Ichigo: Whatever… (Slowly materializes the hollow out)_

_**Ruckus: Welcome, albino bastard!**_

_Hichigo: (cackles as he appears) Hello there!_

_**Ruckus: So, tell me, what are you going to do with your prize if you win it?**_

_Hichigo: Not if. When. When I win, I'm going to give him to king of course!_

_**Ruckus: Then why did you join this game?**_

_Hichigo: Well, if I didn't join, king wouldn't have the guts to claim that kitty's ass. (Grimmjow growls in the background at being called kitty)_

_**Ruckus: How nice of you…**_

_Hichigo: Don't get me wrong… I'm not being nice here, I just hate it when the king gets depress over not getting some ass. It rains so much inside, I think that it's gonna flood soon enough._

_**Ruckus: Ok then, let's start now to save you from the flood! First question, who is the King of Rock & Roll? A) Elvis Presley, B) Ichigo Kurosaki, C) Aizen Sousuke or D) Michael Jackson?**_

_Hichigo: B)! No, no, just kidding only, though the berry is my king, I doubt he was the King of Rock & Roll. A)._

_**Ruckus: And you're right! I suppose you learn about human culture through Ichigo?**_

_Hichigo: Yeah, if I bother him enough._

_**Ruckus: Haha! Ok, next question, which of the following is not consider a part of chemistry? A) Organic chemistry, B) Organometallic chemistry, C) Polymer chemistry or D) Biochemistry?**_

_Hichigo: This is where listening to that Quincy comes in useful. D)._

_**Ruckus: Uryuu sure is smart, and you're just desperate enough to save yourself from being flooded. Next question, who is the father of evolution? A) Albert Einstein, B) Charles Darwin, C) Nikola Tesla or D) Isaac Newton?**_

_Hichigo: B)_

_**Ruckus: You should thank Uryuu the next time when you see him! Fourth question, which of the following words represents a fear of fire? A) Agoraphobia, B) Autophobia, C) Pyrophobia or D) Microphobia?**_

_Hichigo: Fire… As in like Pyromaniac? Then it's C)._

_**Ruckus: And that's the correct answer! Who knew that you have knowledge beside powers and a thirst for blood?**_

_Hichigo: Oi, insulting me are you?_

_**Ruckus: No, just **_**_deriding you. Let's continue on to the next question. What is the value of x as derived from the following equation?_**

**_x2 + 5x + 12 = (x + 2) (x - 3)_**

**_A) -3, B) 1, C) -2, D) 0?_**

_Hichigo: Gimme a paper and pen… I need to work this out._

_**Ruckus: (hands over paper and pen) Go ahead, take your time…**_

_Hichigo: (scribbles, chewing the end of the pen occasionally) There! Done!_

_**Ruckus: So your answer is?**_

_Hichigo: A)._

_**Ruckus: Not bad… Sixth question, what is the name of the explorer who found the New World? A) **_**_Leif Ericson, B) Marco Polo, C) Christopher Columbus or D) Hernán Cortés?_**

_Hichigo: Man, you're trying to kill King's brain… (scratches head) C)._

_**Ruckus: And you're right! Christopher Columbus was the one to discover the New World! Next question, which of the following bands are not rock bands? A) The Beatles, B) Led Zeppelin, C) Nirvana, or D) S Club 7?**_

_Hichigo: D)._

_**Ruckus: Right again! The prize for the answering the seventh question correctly is a pole dance from Grimmy-chan using you as the pole!* The eighth question is, what does **_**_adagio means? A) Very, very slow, B) Slow, C) Swiftly or D) Lively?_**

_Hichigo: Music is my strong suit! So my answer is B)._

_**Ruckus: You mean classical music? It doesn't suit you at all! Anyway, back to the question, B) is your final answer?**_

_Hichigo: Of course._

_**Ruckus: Congratulations on winning a lap dance from Grimmy-chan!**_

_Hichigo: King will kill me if I do accept that as my prize… I'll leave it for King to claim._

_**Ruckus: Alright, the ninth question is which of the following trigonometric functions is wrong? A) Cogent, B) Cosine, C) Sine, or D) Tangent?**_

_Hichigo: Wah! I hate trigo! This is also the subject that King is worst at! I don't get what's all this terms!_

_**Ruckus: Just pick one…**_

_Hichigo: Fine then, I pick A)._

_**Ruckus: Lucky you! You win a strip tease/lap dance combo! And finally we have reached the last question! If you answer this correctly, you will win Grimmjow for Ichigo!**_

_Hichigo: Fuck yeah! Bring it on!_

_**Ruckus: What kind of animals does a person with **_**_Batrachophobia get afraid of? A) Cats, B) Mouse, C) Birds, or D) Frogs?_**

_Hichigo: What is this Batrachophobia? I've never hear of this before!_

_**Ruckus: Then do you wanna give up?**_

_Hichigo: No way! I'll just pick one and see if I'm just as lucky as the first time. C)._

_**Ruckus: Guess what, you're not lucky enough… C) is incorrect and the strip tease/lap dance combo from Grimmjow is yours!**_

_Hichigo: Well, then I'll leave now! Tell King that the strip tease/lap dance combo from the kitty is my gift to him!_

_**Ruckus: Ok then! Thanks for coming!**_

_Hichigo: (phases out, Ichigo slowly appears)_

_**Ruckus: Well come back Ichigo!**_

_Ichigo: So? Did Hichi win?_

_**Ruckus: Nope! He didn't win the game, but he got a prize just for you! It's a strip tease/lap dance combo from Grimmjow!**_

_Ichigo: (blushes) What!_

_**Ruckus: You heard me right! Now sit down and I'll get Grimmy-chan to serve up your prize! (pushes Ichigo into a chair and walks off to let Grimmjow out of the cage)**_

_Ichigo: (stammers) B-but…_

_**Ruckus: No buts for you unless you mean Grimmy-chan's~~!**_

_Ichigo: (turns even redder, looking uncomfortable)_

_Grimmjow: You sick pervert! I'm not going to do this!_

_**Ruckus: Grimmy-chan, I know how much you like Ichigo! And how you dreamed of having his big d-**_

_Grimmjow: (covers Ruckus' mouth) Pretend you didn't hear that, berry._

_Ichigo: Er, ok… (looks confused)_

_**Ruckus: (pulls away Grimmjow's hand and gasp for breath) Oi! You trying to kill me?!**_

_Grimmjow: No, I wasn't trying, I was going to kill you!_

_**Ruckus: How mean! And here I was trying to help you fulfill your dreams of being pounded into the bed by the strawberry!**_

_Grimmjow: Y-you! (face heating up)_

_Ichigo: Can I say something?_

**_Ruckus: Yeah, sure._**

_Ichigo: I like Grimmjow too._

Grimmjow: (jaw drop) Really?

**_Ruckus: Oh yeah! I totally knew it!_**

_Ichigo: So are you going to give me my prize, Grimmjow? (purrs)_

Grimmjow: (looks away shyly) O-ok…

**_Ruckus: Gyah! Music please! (quickly sits down)_**

Grimmjow: (repeats the moves from earlier, but with a more confident and sensual touch)

**_Ruckus: Get on with it!_**

Grimmjow: (looks pissed but continues, walking towards Ichigo, hands lingering near his obi)

_Ichigo: (stares intently at the hands)_

Grimmjow: (straddles Ichigo's thighs, hands running over the broad chest)

_Ichigo: (shifts a bit, hands moving to Grimmjow's hips)_

Grimmjow: (thrusts his hips against Ichigo's, moaning softly)

_Ichigo: (eyes sliding shut, groaning slightly)_

Grimmjow: (pulls away from Ichigo's grasp, turns away and bends over, showing off his pert ass)

_Ichigo: (eyes blinks open at the loss of warmth on his lap, blood dripping from his nose at the sight in front of him)_

Grimmjow: (looks back at Ichigo coquettishly, a soft blush apparent on his face) (continues with his performance, untying the obi and letting his hakama falls)

_Ichigo: (serious bleeding occurring from the nose, faints from blood loss)_

**_Ruckus: Oops! Medics! Please come now! We have a casualty here! (in comes the medical team and carries Ichigo away)_**

Grimmjow: (puts back on his clothes, looking worried) Did I go overboard?

**_Ruckus: (grins) Nope! It was just too hot for him to handle! (remembers something) Oh! I forgot to tell him that he will be our last contestant!_**

Grimmjow: Well, just drag him back here when he wakes up!

**_Ruckus: Eager to be his bitch huh? (waggles eyebrows)_**

Grimmjow: (stutters) N-no…

**_Ruckus: Don't worry, I'll get him back here. (turns to the camera) This show is entering a long commercial break due to Ichigo's major blood loss. We'll be back soon!_**

***: If you guys had noticed, I missed out on the prize for the seventh question, so here's the correction... Sorry about that!_  
_**


	6. Contestant 5: Ichigo

**_Who wants to be Grimmjow's Seme? Bleach Edition_**

_Chapter 5_

**_Ruckus: Welcome back! Ichigo, our last contestant for this game show is awake now!_**

_Ichigo: Why am I here again? (holding a tissue to his nose)_

**_Ruckus: Because Hichigo signed you up for this too!_**

_Ichigo: Damn that idiot…_

**_Ruckus: Don't be upset, at least you have the chance of making Grimmjow truly yours!_**

_Ichigo: That's true…_

**_Ruckus: So do we begin now?_**

_Ichigo: Sure._

**_Ruckus: Alrighty then! First question, how many prefectures are there in Japan? A) 50, B) 22, C) 47 or D) 46_**

_Ichigo: Ishida pounded this into my head, saying that as a Japan citizen, I should, at the very least, know how many prefectures we have, so it's C)._

**_Ruckus: That knowledge is useful and it has helped you with this first question!_**

_Ichigo: Well, at least that all that time spent studying with him is not wasted…_

**_Ruckus: It certainly won't be! Second question, the word "pyriform" is used to describe which fruit? A) Apples, B) Bananas, C) Oranges or D) Pears?_**

_Ichigo: D)._

**_Ruckus: That is your final answer?_**

_Ichigo: Yes._

**_Ruckus: And you're right! The third question is, how many chromosomes do humans have? A) 26, B)25, C) 23 or D) 20?_**

_Ichigo: If I get the answer for this wrong, I think that old goat of mine is gonna kill me. The answer is C)._

**_Ruckus: Yep, you should know biology quite well, since that old goat is a doctor. And thank your lucky stars that you got it right._**

_Ichigo: Phew._

**_Ruckus: Moving on to the fourth question! Which of the following belongs to the group II elements? A) Beryllium Calcium Barium, B) Lithium Caesium Chromium, C) Sodium Magnesium Rubidium or D) Titanium Potassium Vanadium?_**

_Ichigo: -_-||| Not Chemistry… I'd say it's A)._

**_Ruckus: And you say that you are not good in chemistry… Well then, let's get to the fifth question. How many statues of Hachiko are there in Japan? A) 2, B) 4, C) 5 or D) 1?_**

_Ichigo: I think there were four…_

**_Ruckus: I think there was only one._**

_Ichigo: You're just trying to sway my decision right?_

**_Ruckus: Maybe…_**

_Ichigo: Well then, I'll go with B)._

**_Ruckus: As according to our sources, the number of Hachiko statues that were erected is four, so you're right!_**

_Ichigo: And I suppose your sources would be Wikipedia?_

**_Ruckus: Hehe… Where else do you think we would have gotten it from? That aside, we should proceed on to the sixth question! Which of the listed cities is the capital of Lithuania? A) Moscow, B) Rome, C) Beijing or D) Vilnius?_**

_Ichigo: D)._

**_Ruckus: This is going fast… Before I reveal the answer, can you tell me what are you going to do if you win?_**

_Ichigo: (blushes) What I am going to do is none of your business!_

**_Ruckus: Pooey… If you are thinking of taking him out on a date or fucking him into oblivion, I would have helped you make a video…_**

_Ichigo: Just ask me the next question!_

**_Ruckus: Mou, so impatient… Alrighty, the seventh question is… _**

_Ichigo: Oi! You haven't tell me if my answer is correct!_

**_Ruckus: Oh right, the answer for the sixth question is D)! Now can I continue?_**

_Ichigo: Yes._

**_Ruckus: Ok, the seventh question is, what is the product of the following chemical reaction?_**

**_Acid + Alcohol =__**

**_A) Esters, B) Ethers, C) Aldehydes or D) Amine?_**

_Ichigo: A)._

**_Ruckus: Yep, you're right! The eighth question now! This is moving fast! In which year was the Statue of Liberty erected? A) 1886, B) 1885, C) 1938 or D) 1984?_**

_Ichigo: Er… It was in the 19th century, so it's either A) or B)… And my gut tells me that it's A)._

**_Ruckus: So that is your final answer?_**

_Ichigo: Yeah, A)._

**_Ruckus: Correct! Two more questions left! Ok, ninth question, who is the founder of penicillin? A) Albert Einstein, B) Alexander Fleming, C) Galileo Galilei or D) James Watt?_**

_Ichigo: B)._

**_Ruckus: Alright! You have one more question left! Woohoo!_**

_Ichigo: Get on with it!_

**_Ruckus: Sheesh, ok. Last question is, who were involved in the War of the Roses? A) York and Lancaster, B) Tudor and Bedford, C) Hampshire and Gloucester or D) Sutcliffe and Somerset?_**

_Ichigo: Geez, you guys sure like history huh?_

**_Ruckus: Yes, and you sure is bad at it. So answer the question already!_**

_Ichigo: Thank god for Ishida. A)._

**_Ruckus: Yes, thank god for Ishida, and congratulations! You are the winner of our game show! And you get to walk away with Grimmjow as your lover!_**

Grimmjow: Great! So I can leave now?

**_Ruckus: Hold on! We still have a bonus question for Ichigo!_**

Grimmjow: You mean there's more?!

**_Ruckus: Of course! At the start of the game show, I mentioned that there will be a bonus question with a mystery prize and that prize is… Drum rolls please! A tied up Grimmjow!_**

_Ichigo: (nosebleeds)_

**_Ruckus: Hehe, Ichigo is one kinky guy eh?_**

Grimmjow: (mutters) Stupid perverted berry… (turning pink in the face)

_Ichigo: (rubs away the blood) So what's the question?_

**_Ruckus: Ok, here's the question, why did the red bean turned green and the green bean turned red?_**

_Ichigo: What the fuck?! What kind of question is this?!_

**_Ruckus: Well, you can choose not to answer this question and just walk away with the grand prize…_**

_Ichigo: Fine, can I ask for help?_

**_Ruckus: Well, for this question, yes. You can make a call to one person and ask them._**

_Ichigo: Ok, I wanna call Renji._

**_Ruckus: (passes Ichigo a phone) Take your time._**

_Ichigo: Hey Renji! Do you know why did the red bean turned green and the green bean turned red? (pauses) Really? That's the answer? I'll explain it to you some other time, thanks!_

**_Ruckus: So, what's your answer?_**

_Ichigo: The red bean turned green because it got sick looking at the blood flowing out of the green bean, and the green bean turned green because it fell and broke its head._

**_Ruckus: Haha, looks like Renji was a great help!_**

_Ichigo: That means I get the bonus prize too?_

**_Ruckus: Of course! But you need to wait for a bit, we need to get Grimmy-chan ready!_**

Grimmjow: Damn you scrawny bastard! Wait till I get my hands on you! (let out of the cage and gets dragged to backstage)

**_Ruckus: Aww, Grimmy-chan, don't be upset! I know that you like it rough!_**

_Ichigo: You're a pervert, host-san…_

**_Ruckus: You're too kind, I'd prefer the term yaoi fanatic._**

_Ichigo: (look of disbelief on face) Whatever…_

**_Ruckus: While we wait, can I ask you some questions?_**

_Ichigo: Like?_

**_Ruckus: Which part of Grimmy-chan do you love most?_**

_Ichigo: \ =_= / What kind of question is that?_

**_Ruckus: Just answer it, not like it's going to kill you or anything…_**

_Ichigo: Well… I guess it's his Resurreccion form…_

**_Ruckus: He looks so cool in his Resurreccion form!_**

_Ichigo: Any other questions?_

**_Ruckus: Well, no more, cause Grimmy-chan is coming out! (cues a naked, tied up Grimmjow being wheeled out on a cart)_**

_Ichigo: Whoa! You guys made him look like a turkey ready for roasting…_

**_Ruckus: We have to be creative so as to cover up places where others are not supposed to see!_**

Grimmjow: (gagged) Mmphmm!

_Ichigo: But the people who were tying him up would have saw everything!_

**_Ruckus: No worries, our team are full of fujoshis, so it's alright!_**

_Ichigo: =_= I don't understand you…_

**_Ruckus: Doesn't matter, just go ahead and enjoy your prize! We have prepared your room with lots of fun things for your usage._**

_Ichigo: (looks embarrassed) Thank you._

**_Ruckus: You're welcome! (turns to camera) And thank you viewers for watching! I wonder if the producers are going to make a second season… Hmm…_**

_Credits_

_Characters belonging to Tite Kubo_

_Spinoff of Who Wants To Be A Millionaire_

_Plot belonging to Yuu91_

_Copyrights belongs to the respective owners_

_Please credit them if using their ideas_

_Somewhere else…_

Ichigo wheels the tied up Grimmjow into the room prepared for them, closing the door after him. He lifts Grimmjow from the cart and carries him over to the bed, gently setting him down.

Sitting back on his heels, he looks over Grimmjow's body, his eyes roving over the chiseled peach skin stretching over taut muscles and strong bones. Grimmjow could only blush at the attention showered upon him, as he has no way of covering up his body with his hands and legs trussed up like a turkey ready for roasting.

The substitute shinigami smiles at him, leaning in to pull away the gag before kissing Grimmjow right on the lips. He nibbles softly at the lips, enticing them to part, to grant him entrance into that warm wet cavern that they are guarding.

Grimmjow moans, his slightly swollen lips parting, letting the intruder in. Ichigo's tongue fervently mapped out Grimmjow's mouth, discovering little spots that makes the Espada mewl like the kitten he is.

Feeling the need to breath, Ichigo pulls away, a soft whine escaping from those luscious lips that he was previously kissing. He chuckles at the pout presented to him, and moves to shower kisses all over the Arrancar's face.

Starting from Grimmjow's forehead, he laid kisses from there to his jawline, chin, cheeks and nose, even on the bone piece on the right side of his jaw. Then he proceeds to kiss his ears, nibbling at the soft lobe and cartilage, ascertaining a few sensitive spots.

The kisses continue down to the hollow's neck, making the other squirm beneath the ticklish kisses. Getting frustrated with all the teasing, Grimmjow growls at Ichigo, wishing that he could move on to something else.

Getting the message, Ichigo pauses in his teasing, pulling away to peel off his clothes, exposing his lightly tanned skin to a drooling Grimmjow. Smirking, Ichigo continues in his little strip show, removing everything except for his boxers.

Miffed, Grimmjow snaps at Ichigo, telling him to get on with it before he decides to kick him in the groin. A wide grin splits Ichigo's face as he unties Grimmjow's legs, moving them into another position before wrapping the tawny silk around those long long limbs, holding them in place.

Ichigo presses his body against Grimmjow's, this time laving his attention and his tongue on Grimmjow's pectorals and nipples. He sucked on the dusky brown nubs until they are swollen and hard, glistening with a wet, slick sheen of his saliva.

Then he continues down south, pressing soft kisses against the cream peach skin until he reaches Grimmjow's erection. The shinigami licks the length teasingly, running along it softly, coaxing a guttural groan from the Pantera wielder.

He grins even more at the groan and took the length into his mouth, sucking on it like a lollipop, occasionally bobbing his head. He listens to the sweet moans, his cock swelling and growing harder.

Once again, he pulls away, getting off the bed to look for the things prepared for them. He finds the assortment of toys, lubes and bondage material on a trolley that he had not notice when the both of them had entered.

He picks up one of the lubes and walks back to the bed. Opening the tube, he squeezes a generous amount of the lube on to his fingers and looms over Grimmjow, grinning as he trails his slicked fingers down Grimmjow's torso, slowly meandering to his length and down to the hidden crevice.

Unhurriedly, Ichigo pushes one finger in and curls it, experimenting with how far he could stretch. Upon hearing Grimmjow's hiss of pain, he uncurls his finger, choosing to rub the muscles surrounding his fingers with his fingertip, to let Grimmjow get used to the feeling.

As Grimmjow adjusts to the feeling, he urges Ichigo to put in more fingers, anxious to have Ichigo's length sheathed within him. A second, third and fourth finger enters him and scissors the muscles apart, loosening them for the bigger thing to come.

As the muscles relax, having adjusted to the fingers placed inside, Grimmjow begins to find pleasure from being fingered. During the insertion of the third finger, Ichigo had discerned the location of his prostrate, making him scream out in pleasure.

A few minutes later, Ichigo deems Grimmjow well prepared enough and removes the last piece of clothing on his body, slathering his engorged dick with the lube. Aligning himself with Grimmjow's entrance, he slow pushes in, telling Grimmjow to give him a signal if he feels pain.

Gradually, Grimmjow's muscles surround his whole length, the tight squeeze making him groan out in appreciation. He pauses, letting Grimmjow get used to the feeling, only continuing when Grimmjow seems much more comfortable.

The substitute shinigami pulls out slightly and thrusts back in, trying his best to locate the sensitive bundle of nerves again. Alas, he has no such luck. It was after several thrust later that he managed to locate it again.

Grinning at Grimmjow's reaction, he thrusts at the same angle towards the spot with more force, making his uke moan wantonly, like a bitch in heat. As they progress, Grimmjow starts moving along with Ichigo, trying to get Ichigo deeper inside him.

When Ichigo had first entered, Grimmjow had only felt pain. But when Ichigo's cock was fully sheathed inside him, a feeling of bliss overcame him at the fullness inside him. Gradually, as Ichigo began to move, little jolts of pleasure were coursing through his body. And when Ichigo found that magical spot that makes stars explode in front of his eyes, his body felt so wonderful and hot, as if he would combust spontaneously the next minute.

Soon, both of their bodies reach their limits, the onset of their climax approaching with each minute, second. Ichigo increases his speed and force, his movements becoming more erratic, while Grimmjow reaches a hand towards his neglected erection, stroking it, bringing him to release.

Ichigo follows closely, his own release triggered by the unimaginably tight clench exerted by Grimmjow's walls on his erection, his cum shooting deep inside Grimmjow. Sated and tired from their first experience, Ichigo removes himself from Grimmjow, lying down beside Grimmjow and pulls the Espada to snuggle close to him.

Dreams of their future together descend upon them as they both fall in to a blissful sleep.


	7. Author's note

_Author's note_

I hope you guys enjoyed reading this! I might have another story that has the same concept, but of a different fandom/pairing. Thanks for reading and see you soon!

Disclaimer: Bleach and Who Wants To Be A Millionaire does not belongs to me. This story is purely made for leisure reading, not to make money.


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